It has become the ultimate word to denote an ignorant, narrow minded, religious bigot. Words are incredibly powerful. Words are the vehicles through which ideas, concepts and values are delivered. If you say it often enough, from a broad enough platform, with enough “respectable” voices…. it will become acceptable. Soon, it will become respectable.For a new value to become acceptable, the “traditional” must be attacked. One of the most effective ways to attack is to coin a new word and define it in such a way that it belittles the value you seek to replace. While this may sound silly, it is anything but silly.

The word is “homophobic (or homophobia).” You know what “traditional values” it attacks – heterosexuality and marriage. Do you think that people who uphold the value of heterosexual marriage coined this word? I think not.

The word means “fear of homosexuals.” It is hurled as an accusation against anyone who opposes homosexuality. Its purpose (it’s quite effective) is to cause everyone who opposes the homosexual agenda to be defensive. It is an attack word. It is accusatory. It questions your character.

Think about it for a moment: You believe homosexuality to be morally wrong. When someone hurls the “H-word” at you, are they accusing you of opposing a lifestyle or are they accusing you of opposing a group of people?

You see, the tactic is to not allow you to separate a person from that person’s actions. If you disapprove of my actions, you disapprove of me! Is that necessarily so?

Let me illustrate it this way: Parents, can you disapprove of your child’s behavior and continue to love your child? Can you strongly disapprove of their behavior and still love them as your child? Does that make you “childaphobic [pedophobic]?” Is disapproval of their actions an indication that you love them less? Does that mean you hate your child or children in general? Why not? If disapproving of homosexual behavior makes you a “homosexual hater,” why doesn’t disapproving of certain behavior of children make you a “child hater?”

Behavior is to be distinguished from the person himself. Behavior can be changed. You can disapprove of a person’s behavior and still value the person. You can “Love your neighbor as yourself” and not approve of his actions. In fact, I strongly counsel parents to never approve of their children’s wrongdoing. If you truly love your children you will teach them and you will discipline them when they do wrong.

I’m not homophobic, but I do disapprove of homosexuality.

…Ken Stegall